Dept. of Missed Opportunities.

It hit me like a bolt of lightning this afternoon. I could have done it. I could have pulled it off and walked away unscathed. I can picture it now. Someone turning in his/her seat and indignantly asking, "What did you say?" And I could have come back with: "Everybody's somber!"

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Wake me when it's over

I almost got into big trouble the other day. Eve and I were attending the funeral of an aunt of hers at Levinson's. We were waiting for the family to file in from the reception room when someone seated in the pews in front either got a phone call or was turning off his/her cell. Anyway, the ring tone played very loud, perky Latin music lasting about 10 seconds. It took all of my self-restraint not to shout out: EVERYBODY SAMBA! But I didn't. I should have. Eve tells me I'm lucky that I used good sense. I'd probably be sleeping alone for the next six months if I hadn't.

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