Pathetic Scumbag of the Week

Disgusting.

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Just Biden' my time

Anyone care to start a pool predicting just how long it will be before our esteemed VPOTUS says the next stupid thing?

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They buried old Fotheringill the other day..dead, you know.

Well...I did admit that I'm a procrastinator. I was honest about it. It was roughly two years ago that a fellow from the neighborhood whom I had just met gave me the URL for the website of a local RC flying club. This was something I'd been interested in for years but never really pursued. Searching the site, I saw the name of a man I had had several connections with in the past. He had been a pharmacist at the drug store I worked in while I was in high school, and about 15 years ago, I became his father's cardiologist. I saw that he was an officer in the club. Since that time I had been saying to myself: Self, let's call Stacy. He'll teach you how to fly. I thought about it again this week and was truly getting closer to doing it. Unfortunately, while reading the paper yesterday, I saw Stacy's obituary. Another life lesson learned.

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Bean There..Done That..

All I can say is that it was a good thing that this was not my first day on the job. The fellow who runs the office (also known as the boss) and I were in the break room together. He's a pretty fastidious guy-something that I noticed the other day when, as we both stood in front of the Mr.Coffee, he made a real effort to clean up the few drips of water that remained on the counter after we had poured our cups. This morning he did the same thing after he filled his mug. Then it was my turn. I quickly pulled the pot off of the burner and was poised to pour. Unfortunately (in my haste) the mouth of the pot caught on the handle of the filter holder, and I managed to pull the entire thing off of the machine. In perfect jellied toast fashion, it landed upside down, and all of the soggy contents of the hot filter were now spread over the counter and floor. It took a while for the boss and me to clean it up. I wondered if this was "grounds" for dismissal?

And speaking of jellied toast...Here's the answer to perpetual motion.

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Monkeying Around

Sorry about the last entry. I'm not sure how that ape hacked into this blog, though if nothing else, he did sound sincere. Thanks to all of the PETA folks who wrote in and expressed their support for Travis, but the (once) cute little chimp who captured the world's imagination will not be a regular contributor to Shy and Retiring.

At work they asked me to prepare a cardiology class for the new
disability examiners. Luckily, I've been working on a lecture for the ALJs and I will just borrow from that one. Power Point is a wonderful thing. Unfortunately the SSA computer system won't let me get to any sites where I can find echocardiographic videos to use. So, I have to capture them on my home computer and transfer them to work. Of course, the email system at work won't allow these types of files to be sent in, and the PCs that we use will not accept flash drives. It makes it quite a chore, but I'll figure it out.

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Saving Face

Let's make one thing clear from the get-go. I don't blame Sandy. I’m like: It’s cool. When the heat was on, the easiest thing in the world to do was to throw me under the bus. Just blame it on the chimp. Heard they froze her assets this week anyway--Ouch! The paparazzi? and the shills from the MSM? They were like: Mad Monkey Attacks! Who's going to listen to me anyway? I'm just a goddamn primate. I was like: How about MY side of the story. Wasn't it enough that I wore a stupid diaper and had to water that brown dandelion patch they called a lawn? Wasn't it enough that I had to listen to Mistress Sandra snore all night? You think putting up with her lame friends was easy? Think again, my friend. Bet you read in the papers that she gave me wine to drink. Brother, we're not talking Kendall-Jackson or Sonoma-Cutrer. Hell, we're not even talking Gallo or Manishewitz. Think Thunderbird or Mad Dog. Now you're catching on. Sometimes enough IS enough! Tough luck that my pal Roscoe took the hit. I was like: Don’t open the car door, man--Barney Fife has his one bullet loaded! Oh well…such is life. It was rough for a few months, especially in that room they stuck me in below the garage. Nothing like my old crib. The food (if that's what you can call it) really sucked. Of course, I did lose a few pounds- which should help me with the ladies...but that’s another story altogether. Anyway, now that all the commotion’s died down, I'm like exploring my options. Thinking about the talk show circuit. No worries-I’ll survive. Peace, baby.

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The Sound of Music

I was thinking about my grandson at work today. After all, he's already 4 1/2. It's certainly not too early to consider his college education. I recall how competitive things were when my kids were applying in the 1990s. I can only imagine what it'll be like in 2023. But I have a plan, and I presented it to Rachel this morning. Strategy is key, of course. I suspect most every child growing up today will apply to the Ivies with a transcript/resume stuffed with all manner of interesting extra-curricular activities. What one needs to stand out from the crowd is something unique. Something different. Lacrosse? fencing? summers working in chemistry labs? Habitat for Humanity? Fuggedaboudid! Now, If I can only convince Micah to spend the next 14 years learning how to do this, he's in. No question. All we have to do is find a tutor.

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The Hills Have Eyes (except in this case)

Is there something wrong with me? I wouldn't have spent five minutes looking for this guy if (in fact) he was hiking alone in the mountains. It's one thing if he was with others and somehow was accidentally abandoned, but blind and hiking alone? Someone tell me why any effort should have been made on his behalf. He's "fiercely independent." Great! You're so independent? Next time find your own way home. Don't put hundreds of others at risk looking for a blind man in the mountains.

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And They're Off....

50:1 shot, eh? As I pointed out last year on Preakness day, it's a damned horse. Nobody told him he wasn't supposed to win. And just like last year, I can't wait to hear all of the learned analysis.

Speaking of learned analysis, though I could be wrong, it looks more and more as if this flu thing is a total bust. We should all be thankful for that, but look at all the waste of effort and all of the panic. And speaking of horses and horses' asses, at least the Vice-President was on top of things with his travel comments. I wonder if they've re-activated that Secret Service squad? You know, the one they had in place during the early 1970's whose job it was to "take out" Spiro Agnew if something unexpected happened to President Nixon? Let's hope President Obama didn't catch the flu while visiting Mexico.

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