From Woodlawn with Love

So it's been over a week since I completed all of the required paperwork for the SSA position. I called my contact there last week and was assured that the grants office would move on my case since the disability determination office would really like me to start. I called today to check on progress and was told that once the grants and acquisitions office approves me, then I need to pass a security check. I knew it! That jaunt through the "abandoned" missile base back in 1970 is going to come back and bite me! I hope they don't flutter (spy jargon-subject to a lie detector) me. I wonder how much waterboarding I could endure? Everyone breaks under questioning-it's just a question of how long one can hold out. It's important to stick to your legend no matter what. I never told you all, but I did apply to the CIA two years ago for a medical officer position. Haven't heard a thing yet. My sense is that they're doing a very thorough background search before I'm formally approached. Perhaps I am a little old to participate in mokroye delo , but I do possess certain talents (which I am not at liberty to discuss here) that would be invaluable to The Company.

Well, I sent an email off to SSA and hope to motivate them a bit. Ha!

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How the Mighty Have Fallen

Pfizer pulls controversial Lipitor TV ads.
The CBS Evening News (2/25, story 6, 0:30, Couric) reported, "You won't be seeing any more of those Lipitor (atorvastatin calcium) ads featuring Dr. Robert Jarvik who invented the artificial heart." Drugmaker "Pfizer said it's pulling the ads for the cholesterol-lowering drug because they led to 'misimpressions.'"

According to NBC Nightly News (2/25, story 9, 0:35, Williams), "Questions about Dr. Jarvik's credibility as a spokesman" have been raised by a congressional committee, among others.

On the front page of its Business Day section, the New York Times (2/26, C1, Saul) notes that Pfizer "spent more than $258 million advertising Lipitor since January 2006, most of it on the Jarvik campaign, as the company sought to protect Lipitor, the world's best-selling drug, from competition by cheaper generics."

According to the Wall Street Journal (2/26, B5, Johnson), "Dr. Jarvik has starred in six campaigns for Pfizer." As an example, "[o]ne ad depicts him at a lake discussing why he takes Lipitor." The ad "plays up the fact that he is a physician, saying, 'Just because I'm a doctor doesn't mean I don't worry about my cholesterol,'" and adding, "Lipitor is one of the most researched medicines. You don't have to be a doctor to appreciate that."

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of the readers of
Shy and Retiring for the grassroots letter writing campaign that was finally able to convince Pfizer to dislodge and jettison that mountebank Jarvik from his position as spokesdoctor for Lipitor. This was a very effective use of our collective voice here at S&R, but realize that we have only won half of the battle. The next (and most critical) phase is to convince the suits at Pfizer that yours truly should be offered the exalted position of touter-in-chief for Atorvastatin. I refer you to an earlier post where my unique qualifications for this job were clearly outlined .

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Fedbizopps II

Arrgh! Finally finished all of the forms and registrations needed for the SSA job. I have my own DUNS number, MPIN, TPIN, TIN, CCR entry and ORCA entry. I have successfully navigated my way through the original proposal's 63 page form. I submitted three paper and two online copies of that mini-tome. I have spoken with folks on multiple help desks (who were surprisingly cordial, I might add), and I have met face to face with one of my erstwhile online SSA friends. I took one trip out to deliver the stuff and realized that I had driven to the wrong location. Fortunately, my original contact person called me to find out my application status while I was driving around searching for the correct address and she was able to guide me correctly. Now to sit back and see just how long the remainder of the process takes.

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License to Shill II

Well, now it appears that Dr. Jarvik may have been using a stunt double in his celebrated pro-Lipitor commercials. It wasn't really him rowing. Loyal readers of this Blog (I'm not sure if there are any readers-loyal or not.) will recall that I offered my services to Pfizer (in light of my unique qualifications) in my entry of 1/8/08. The fact of the matter is that I MYSELF bike 4-5 miles on most days. I have never used a double. Of course, the price for my endorsement has gone up but is still negotiable. I'm waiting.

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Pudding my best foot forward

I'm on a streak. Got into trouble again yesterday. Some of my online friends had been talking about banana pudding for weeks so I finally asked for the recipe. I gathered all of the ingredients and went to work. Here's the recipe:

2 packages of vanilla (I used banana) pudding
1 quart of milk
1 can of sweetened condensed milk
1 tub of Coolwhip
1 brick of creamcheese
3 bananas
Vanilla wafers

Dir: Combine ingredients (except for wafers and bananas) in blender at low speed until creamy.
Pour in bowl.
Slice in bananas, cover, and chill in refrigerator.
Spoon over crisp vanilla wafers.
Enjoy.
Watch thighs, mid section, and buttocks expand.
Get hollered at by all females in life who try it.

I slowly put all of the ingredients into the mixer except for one. I sort of dropped that brick of creamcheese right in, wondering how the appliance would deal with it. Big mistake. The bowl started violently shaking from the unbalanced addition, much like an asymmetric load in a washing machine. Everything started sloshing around and splattering. I grabbed for the control bar but slid it to "high" (I don't think I've ever used the mixer before) instead of "off". That's when the pudding hit the fan, the eruption occured, and the entire corner of the kitchen where I was working-myself included- was covered in a sticky, milky mess. Needless to say, it took a while to clean up. I ultimately got most of it into a huge bowl, cut up the bananas, covered it, and coaxed it into the refrigerator.
I also made "from scratch" pizza with whole wheat flour. The last time I had used yeast was when I grew it in microbiology class in college. It's amazing how quickly they start generating gas once you add them to water. The pizza was good. Great crust! Then came dessert. My bride said it was delicious but accused me of sabotaging her "diet" (She only weighs 110 lbs). I took the bowl to my daughter's house and gave her two thirds of it, but she joined forces with her mother.."You're a cardiologist..What were you thinking?" The only one who didn't give me grief was my grandson. He liked it. That was good enough for me.

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